Tuesday, July 31, 2012
Sunday, July 29, 2012
Hmmmm.....
I've had this opened for 20 minutes. Stare at the screen. Watch Big Bang Theory. Stare at the screen. Check Facebook.
I have no blog topic. Hmm....
So, for now, I'll just say HI *waving to everyone*
I have no blog topic. Hmm....
So, for now, I'll just say HI *waving to everyone*
Tuesday, July 24, 2012
Independence
This is from a series of tweets I did on Friday morning--
It's taken me over 18 months since my ex left, but I'm finally feeling like a much more independent woman who doesn't need a man to help
I was completely dependent on my ex-husband. When he left, I was terrified because I thought I needed him to make it. Finding I just need ME
Now, I've learned that I don't need a man or anyone else. I need me and#Igotthisshit. #independentbitch
(almost done, I promise)...and while I don't need a man, I really like the one I've got. I want him in my life. Much healthier balance.
Lately, with the house on the market, home with the kids, stressed out about what will happened next, I've done a lot of self reflection. I've thought about how different it is from before. As I said in that tweet, I was completely dependent on A. There was so much that I was fully reliant on A to get done for our home or family. I didn't even try. I wasn't a good wife in a lot of respects. I see the stress I put on him for that. I see that I put everything into my work at Heroes for Children and my time as a mother that I didn't do other things. He complained at times and I would try.
It took A leaving me for me to become the woman he wanted me to be.
Now, it all falls to me. Boyfriend helps when he can, but it's not always something that he can do given our time apart. If the yard needs mowed, I have to do it if he can't get over here. I handle everything regarding our finances, home maintenance, decisions with the house, activities with the kids, etc. I'm bone tired by the end of the day and doing a little more stress eating these days. It's liberating though. Funny how that works though--I think if he hadn't left me, I wouldn't have changed. I might have stayed that wife/woman I was before and not bettered myself or my family. It would have been too easy to stay the same (because, let's face it, change is HARD). Now, I know I'm a better woman because of the work I've been forced to do on myself.
Boyfriend hasn't been around here much. Due to conflicting kid schedules (I have not yet met his daughters), times out of town and his hectic work life right now, time with him is sparse. When we are together, we have fun and enjoy the girls. I should see him once or twice this week and the girls and I spent a very rare weekend with him which was great.
I've discovered I CAN do this.
"I've got this shit" has been my mantra for over a year and a half. Some days, I didn't actually believe it. It was a weak statement or almost a question "I got this shit?" all while thinking I didn't really. Now, I know I do. I can do this. We will hopefully move in the next 30 days (send all your good vibes, mojo, happy thoughts, prayers, etc as some things are in the works with the house) and start off on our new adventure together. I'm excited to have a new home that is for me and the girls. Something little that I can maintain easier and have more financial stability. I will get rid of my minivan to hopefully lower my outrageous car payments (long story but there is so much UGH there!).
I'm an independent woman now who is loved by a wonderful man and has two happy, healthy kids. I've got this shit.
It's taken me over 18 months since my ex left, but I'm finally feeling like a much more independent woman who doesn't need a man to help
I was completely dependent on my ex-husband. When he left, I was terrified because I thought I needed him to make it. Finding I just need ME
Now, I've learned that I don't need a man or anyone else. I need me and
(almost done, I promise)...and while I don't need a man, I really like the one I've got. I want him in my life. Much healthier balance.
Lately, with the house on the market, home with the kids, stressed out about what will happened next, I've done a lot of self reflection. I've thought about how different it is from before. As I said in that tweet, I was completely dependent on A. There was so much that I was fully reliant on A to get done for our home or family. I didn't even try. I wasn't a good wife in a lot of respects. I see the stress I put on him for that. I see that I put everything into my work at Heroes for Children and my time as a mother that I didn't do other things. He complained at times and I would try.
It took A leaving me for me to become the woman he wanted me to be.
Now, it all falls to me. Boyfriend helps when he can, but it's not always something that he can do given our time apart. If the yard needs mowed, I have to do it if he can't get over here. I handle everything regarding our finances, home maintenance, decisions with the house, activities with the kids, etc. I'm bone tired by the end of the day and doing a little more stress eating these days. It's liberating though. Funny how that works though--I think if he hadn't left me, I wouldn't have changed. I might have stayed that wife/woman I was before and not bettered myself or my family. It would have been too easy to stay the same (because, let's face it, change is HARD). Now, I know I'm a better woman because of the work I've been forced to do on myself.
Boyfriend hasn't been around here much. Due to conflicting kid schedules (I have not yet met his daughters), times out of town and his hectic work life right now, time with him is sparse. When we are together, we have fun and enjoy the girls. I should see him once or twice this week and the girls and I spent a very rare weekend with him which was great.
I've discovered I CAN do this.
"I've got this shit" has been my mantra for over a year and a half. Some days, I didn't actually believe it. It was a weak statement or almost a question "I got this shit?" all while thinking I didn't really. Now, I know I do. I can do this. We will hopefully move in the next 30 days (send all your good vibes, mojo, happy thoughts, prayers, etc as some things are in the works with the house) and start off on our new adventure together. I'm excited to have a new home that is for me and the girls. Something little that I can maintain easier and have more financial stability. I will get rid of my minivan to hopefully lower my outrageous car payments (long story but there is so much UGH there!).
I'm an independent woman now who is loved by a wonderful man and has two happy, healthy kids. I've got this shit.
Monday, July 16, 2012
Refresh
For most people, January 1st marks a fresh start. It's a time for new year's resolutions and starting over. For me, my year is more summer to summer. Maybe it's the teacher in me that likes the fresh start at the beginning of the school year. More specifically though, it's from one week of Camp Discovery to the following the next summer.
It's my refresh button.
Going to Camp Discovery has now been my summer tradition for eight summers. I have served as the Arts and Crafts Director since I was pregnant with Maggie. I'm not particularly crafty or artistic, but I can run the room and help the kids make some cool projects. I love it. I'll be honest--I have the cushiest job at camp. I get to be in an air conditioned room all day. I see all cabins and visit with all the kids throughout the week. I don't sleep in a cabin bunkhouse with kids and I don't have a lot of stress. The arts and crafts people work really hard and we help out throughout the week with other things such as running a game during night activities or being on the clean up crew for most nights. It's the best.
Each year, it's a reality check. Life has been tough for me in various ways, but it's NOTHING in comparison to what some of these kids have been through. I feel like I've focused more on my stress lately. There has been plenty, but truthfully, I can't complain.
I have my health. My children are healthy and happy. They're thriving. I have a great career. I have love. I have strong friendships that I appreciate. My mother, grandmother, and brother are a source of strength, comfort, and support.
The button has been pressed. REFRESH
It's my refresh button.
Going to Camp Discovery has now been my summer tradition for eight summers. I have served as the Arts and Crafts Director since I was pregnant with Maggie. I'm not particularly crafty or artistic, but I can run the room and help the kids make some cool projects. I love it. I'll be honest--I have the cushiest job at camp. I get to be in an air conditioned room all day. I see all cabins and visit with all the kids throughout the week. I don't sleep in a cabin bunkhouse with kids and I don't have a lot of stress. The arts and crafts people work really hard and we help out throughout the week with other things such as running a game during night activities or being on the clean up crew for most nights. It's the best.
Each year, it's a reality check. Life has been tough for me in various ways, but it's NOTHING in comparison to what some of these kids have been through. I feel like I've focused more on my stress lately. There has been plenty, but truthfully, I can't complain.
I have my health. My children are healthy and happy. They're thriving. I have a great career. I have love. I have strong friendships that I appreciate. My mother, grandmother, and brother are a source of strength, comfort, and support.
The button has been pressed. REFRESH
Friday, July 6, 2012
Top Ten Reasons This Summer Is Better Than Last
This summer is full of STRESS. Lots going on and so much that consumes both me and Boyfriend. However, it is by far a million times better than last summer.
Here's ten reasons why--
Here's ten reasons why--
- I don't hurt so badly that it hurts to breathe anymore. I am happy and have found peace.
- Maggie isn't having 8 to 10 meltdowns a day over every.little.thing. because she can't process her emotions from the divorce. She's a happy child who daily gives love and kisses.
- I am in love.
- Paris reminded me why I love the French language and teaching others to love it so much.
- There is a beach vacation on our horizon!
- Life still has many uncertainties around here, but they are easier to deal with than the ones of last summer.
- Boyfriend was swimming in the pool with us at the annual fourth of July pool party. There were a few moments I just stopped and smiled watching him with the girls
- Pinterest entertains me when it's quiet in the house at night.
- Katie is freaking hilarious and keeps Maggie and I laughing at all times.
- After a month of being terrified of the water, Maggie started swimming this week! Maybe now she'll actually let us use our pool more!
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Summer Schedule
It's summer time in full swing around here. For the second summer, I'm home with my babies! It's an added perk of being a teacher. I was gone for a week in Paris (still owe a blog post about how great the trip was) and I will be gone a week for cancer camp while the girls take a family trip with A.
The rest of the summer is Camp Mom. We're babysitting a friend's two girls four weeks hanging here at their house. It helps me because it keeps us out of our home and not messing it up for showings and it makes a little extra money. A former coworker offered me her family's condo on the beach in Rockport, TX, so the girls and I are escaping for five days and we can't wait!
To help break up our weeks, I found a fun schedule on Pinterest. Yes, I'm a Pinterest addict. Each day has a theme and it's really helping. Maggie and I love the routine and the fun of knowing what each day is. Here is our schedule--
Make Something Monday--Craft time! This week, we made this homemade gumball machine. Decided that since Mama doesn't allow gum in the house, we would make it an M&M dispenser. It was a big hit! Thinking of this craft for next week. We'll see!
Time to Read Tuesday--Story time at the public library! Took some extra time to read at tables and then checked out a few books. Maggie loves all things American Girl, so we have the book about Lanie right now.
What's Cooking Wednesday--Baking or cooking of some sort. Last week, it was a sprinkle cake. This week? NUTELLA COOKIES. Make these. Trust me. The kids devoured them! Next week,
Be Thoughtful Thursday--This is a time to think about others. Write notes, volunteer (need to figure out something we can do with little ones), and have meetings for Heroes for Children. They have gone with me two weeks in a row to have HFC meetings and Maggie and I discuss helping others as we drive there. Today, the girls all wrote a note to someone they love and included a picture. The friends we're babysitting did their mom since she's out of town this week. Sweet Maggie chose her GaGa and Mom Mom (my mom and my grandma) who she adores.
Somewhere Fun Friday--Last week, it was the local splash pool. Tomorrow, it's a playdate at Tracey's. Each week, we're choosing somewhere fun to go and play. This is so nice because it's eliminated Maggie's begging to go somewhere every day. I don't have the money for that! So, with this, we are able to find fun things to do.
This schedule is a life saver! It has turned our summer into something really great and smooth. Each day, we have rest/nap time. Katie naps for a good two to two and a half hours. She plays so hard and is so wild that she crashes hard too. Maggie can watch TV, color, play quietly in her room but it has to be a quiet time for her as well. I can work on the computer, clean the house, and sometimes I sneak in a nap myself! Nights aren't really planned. They have two nights a week with their dad (I get them fully for two weeks of the summer and he gets two weeks) and one night of gymnastics. We have movie nights, play at the park, or swim in the pool. Last night, the four of us, including Military Man, all piled in the pool, laughing and playing. It was Breakfast for Dinner night (our favorite!)
Maggie is attending a VBS next week in the morning and we have our regular once a month date nights with the girls where A and I split up the girls two nights and do something special with each one. We started that last July and I make sure we set something up with the girls every month. Maggie gets to plan our nights together. Last month, she chose a restaurant we loved called Whiskey Cake then playing mini golf. We've painted pottery, gone to the movies, shopped at the mall and gone to museums. Next week is a girly night of getting our nails painted then seeing Brave at the movie theatre. Next month we have tickets to see the musical Peter Pan, courtesy of the Christmas gift from Boyfriend to see three musicals. Katie is a lot more simple. I take her to play at the mall, the playgroup, go swimming, or just play at home. It is my hope that we will continue this monthly date nights for many years to come with the girls. It's so good for them.
It's going to be a long summer with the house on the market and the uncertainty of where we will end up. It certainly has it's fair amount of stress and feelings of being overwhelmed for me, but hopefully, all my children will remember in the end is the fun we had and the time we spent together.
The rest of the summer is Camp Mom. We're babysitting a friend's two girls four weeks hanging here at their house. It helps me because it keeps us out of our home and not messing it up for showings and it makes a little extra money. A former coworker offered me her family's condo on the beach in Rockport, TX, so the girls and I are escaping for five days and we can't wait!
To help break up our weeks, I found a fun schedule on Pinterest. Yes, I'm a Pinterest addict. Each day has a theme and it's really helping. Maggie and I love the routine and the fun of knowing what each day is. Here is our schedule--
Make Something Monday--Craft time! This week, we made this homemade gumball machine. Decided that since Mama doesn't allow gum in the house, we would make it an M&M dispenser. It was a big hit! Thinking of this craft for next week. We'll see!
Time to Read Tuesday--Story time at the public library! Took some extra time to read at tables and then checked out a few books. Maggie loves all things American Girl, so we have the book about Lanie right now.
What's Cooking Wednesday--Baking or cooking of some sort. Last week, it was a sprinkle cake. This week? NUTELLA COOKIES. Make these. Trust me. The kids devoured them! Next week,
Be Thoughtful Thursday--This is a time to think about others. Write notes, volunteer (need to figure out something we can do with little ones), and have meetings for Heroes for Children. They have gone with me two weeks in a row to have HFC meetings and Maggie and I discuss helping others as we drive there. Today, the girls all wrote a note to someone they love and included a picture. The friends we're babysitting did their mom since she's out of town this week. Sweet Maggie chose her GaGa and Mom Mom (my mom and my grandma) who she adores.
Somewhere Fun Friday--Last week, it was the local splash pool. Tomorrow, it's a playdate at Tracey's. Each week, we're choosing somewhere fun to go and play. This is so nice because it's eliminated Maggie's begging to go somewhere every day. I don't have the money for that! So, with this, we are able to find fun things to do.
This schedule is a life saver! It has turned our summer into something really great and smooth. Each day, we have rest/nap time. Katie naps for a good two to two and a half hours. She plays so hard and is so wild that she crashes hard too. Maggie can watch TV, color, play quietly in her room but it has to be a quiet time for her as well. I can work on the computer, clean the house, and sometimes I sneak in a nap myself! Nights aren't really planned. They have two nights a week with their dad (I get them fully for two weeks of the summer and he gets two weeks) and one night of gymnastics. We have movie nights, play at the park, or swim in the pool. Last night, the four of us, including Military Man, all piled in the pool, laughing and playing. It was Breakfast for Dinner night (our favorite!)
Maggie is attending a VBS next week in the morning and we have our regular once a month date nights with the girls where A and I split up the girls two nights and do something special with each one. We started that last July and I make sure we set something up with the girls every month. Maggie gets to plan our nights together. Last month, she chose a restaurant we loved called Whiskey Cake then playing mini golf. We've painted pottery, gone to the movies, shopped at the mall and gone to museums. Next week is a girly night of getting our nails painted then seeing Brave at the movie theatre. Next month we have tickets to see the musical Peter Pan, courtesy of the Christmas gift from Boyfriend to see three musicals. Katie is a lot more simple. I take her to play at the mall, the playgroup, go swimming, or just play at home. It is my hope that we will continue this monthly date nights for many years to come with the girls. It's so good for them.
It's going to be a long summer with the house on the market and the uncertainty of where we will end up. It certainly has it's fair amount of stress and feelings of being overwhelmed for me, but hopefully, all my children will remember in the end is the fun we had and the time we spent together.
Friday, June 1, 2012
Last Day Love
It's the last day of school. At our teacher luncheon, I got my plaque from winning the student nominated teacher award. It'll be proudly displayed in the my classroom. The best gift I got today was handwritten letters from four of my best students expressing their gratitude to me. I started this job ONE DAY after finalizing my divorce. To say I was in turmoil is an understatement. Truly, this job helped me through. I'm in tears at my desk realizing the impact it has made on my life. I have tears of love and, to be honest, of sheer exhaustion, as I look back since the first day of new teacher training on August 10th.
I don't know that I could properly express it all. Instead, I am going to share a letter from Talia, a 7th grader, who I adore. The letter was a handmade card. It came with a handmade name badge necklace that is gorgeous and a silly paper of pictures of her cat, "Big Larry." Big Larry has made many an appearance in French class, including as the main character of her children's book project.
Typed up exactly as Talia wrote it (in bright blue ink with neon green for the PS). You have to hear this in your head as a sweet girl with a twisted fun sense of humor--
Dear Madame,
I have a absolutely LOVED being in your class this year! On the 1st day of school, I knew you would be my favorite teacher all year. Then that day, probably 2 or 3 weeks into school, I had the steno emergency. I could tell by the way you just laughed and gave me the stapler that we had the same personality. They always say save the best for last, I guess that's why I have French 8th period....THE BEST CLASS OF THE DAY!! Your teaching styles are so great and understable. Everyone enjoys French (if they don't, they should!) You always have fun stories to share whether it is about Maggie, Katie, or even the rare story about Military Man! My favorite stories you tell are still the inspiring ones. Every time one of those comes up it makes me feel like I really can grow up to be what I want to be and make a difference in the world, like you. Maybe one day I'll be that ex-student coming back to one of your classes, telling them about my very own adventures in France. I have enjoyed learning a new language, and thanks to your great teaching, my grade has not gone below 98 all year! Only the very best teachers can relate and make a connection with their students, which you do. Once I get to the high school, I think I'd like to continue French, but those teachers have my high expectations of your great teaching to live up to. I can't wait until next year to make more memories in French. No doubt they'll be great!
Je t'aime!
Talia
PS--I enjoyed meeting your daughters at the talent show. You've raised 2 delightful young ladies and I hope to meet them again when they're older. Maybe by then Katie will have grown into her skin/chunk (as cute as she is, she can't go through life sitting on people she has an issue with!) I'm sure they will both grow up to make you very proud. Best wishes to you and the rest of the gang with the move this summer and have fun in Paris!!
I don't know that I could properly express it all. Instead, I am going to share a letter from Talia, a 7th grader, who I adore. The letter was a handmade card. It came with a handmade name badge necklace that is gorgeous and a silly paper of pictures of her cat, "Big Larry." Big Larry has made many an appearance in French class, including as the main character of her children's book project.
Typed up exactly as Talia wrote it (in bright blue ink with neon green for the PS). You have to hear this in your head as a sweet girl with a twisted fun sense of humor--
Dear Madame,
I have a absolutely LOVED being in your class this year! On the 1st day of school, I knew you would be my favorite teacher all year. Then that day, probably 2 or 3 weeks into school, I had the steno emergency. I could tell by the way you just laughed and gave me the stapler that we had the same personality. They always say save the best for last, I guess that's why I have French 8th period....THE BEST CLASS OF THE DAY!! Your teaching styles are so great and understable. Everyone enjoys French (if they don't, they should!) You always have fun stories to share whether it is about Maggie, Katie, or even the rare story about Military Man! My favorite stories you tell are still the inspiring ones. Every time one of those comes up it makes me feel like I really can grow up to be what I want to be and make a difference in the world, like you. Maybe one day I'll be that ex-student coming back to one of your classes, telling them about my very own adventures in France. I have enjoyed learning a new language, and thanks to your great teaching, my grade has not gone below 98 all year! Only the very best teachers can relate and make a connection with their students, which you do. Once I get to the high school, I think I'd like to continue French, but those teachers have my high expectations of your great teaching to live up to. I can't wait until next year to make more memories in French. No doubt they'll be great!
Je t'aime!
Talia
PS--I enjoyed meeting your daughters at the talent show. You've raised 2 delightful young ladies and I hope to meet them again when they're older. Maybe by then Katie will have grown into her skin/chunk (as cute as she is, she can't go through life sitting on people she has an issue with!) I'm sure they will both grow up to make you very proud. Best wishes to you and the rest of the gang with the move this summer and have fun in Paris!!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)