On Thursday, I officially entered my mid-thirties. I don't know where the time has gone since I turned thirty, but I am now thirty-five. Last year, I did a list of thirty-four things about myself. Most of it still rings true, though my French is not as rusty, I've all but cut out the Diet Coke, and I actually read about four books last year. I won't bore you with another list of things about myself. Instead, I will write about a few things I am seeking this year.
After two years of major change in my life, I am above all else seeking stability this year. I was recently offered a new job that would be another change. It was basically a dream job teaching higher level French with someone I respect and admire. I declined the job offer. It was a long decision process because I really wanted it. However, it meant a huge change again. New coworkers, new lessons, new content level to teach, new boss. It was a slight pay decrease as well. As much as I would like that type of position five years from now, I can't fathom another change now. I love my school and have finally found my niche with friends and colleagues there. It's becoming a family. Stability with my finances, home, work, relationships. This is what I need. A year with no major change and no life altering situations. After the past few years, that simply sounds divine.
I want to focus more and more on QUALITY family time. First and foremost, continued time just me and my girls to focus on the family of three we have built. I love our girl time and the way we love each other. I want more time to craft, snuggle over a movie night, or go play at the park. I want us to have more family time with my mom and my granmda "Mom Mom." We try to have our Four Generations dinner of me, the girls, and the grandmas at least once or twice a month. This is so important to all of us. I want more time with all five of us together, as well as time with my mom. I love her so and she is such a great influence on my life. Finally, I want more time with Boyfriend and his two girls as we learn and navigate becoming this new family. It wasn't until very recently that we got to be together and hang out. It was so much fun. It's not easy to find activities that work for four girls ranging 3 to 15. We don't get much time together since the big girls live over three hours away. I have no expectation for them to accept me as anything but their dad's girlfriend, but I hope they will see, in time, how I care for them as well. I hope that we are able to build a friendship together and have fun as the six of us as we go.
Focus on Me
Boyfriend recently got on my case about not taking time for me or taking care of my needs. That I put everything in front of myself. I have really been trying to make a conscious effort to make this a change. First, I try to focus my one weekend a month without kids or boyfriend on doing things *I* like and seeing people I want to see. I took an overnight trip with my playgroup moms. I am allowing myself to be lazy at night after I put the kids to bed and I'm home alone. Granted, it means that the dishes don't always get done and the laundry pile can get a bit higher, but my stress level is getting better. Next up is exercise. I am currently at the best weight/size of my life. At 35 years old, I look better than I did at 25 and most certainly at 30. Two and a half years after losing most of my weight, I still find myself surprised over my size. I still reach for the large or extra large top before I gradually pick up the small. With all that said, I am FLABBY. As I once heard a friend describe it, I'm "skinny fat." I'm not toned. I had to cut the yoga studio from my budget last year. I need to find something that works from home and make it a priority. I haven't. I haven't made that a necessity and I feel the difference. I don't want to be saying the same thing in 2014 as I'm saying now. Time to make that change for me.
Plain and simple--I want more smiles and less tears.
I think that completes it for this year. There's lots going on and plenty of work to do. I'm volunteering a lot with Heroes for Children on the Board of Directors this year. Boyfriend is extremely busy over the next few weeks. I always miss him whenever we're away from each other for more than a night but I wholeheartedly support his work. He's been working double time lately with his company too. It will be SO nice when he doesn't live an hour away. He's looking to move closer in a few months and it can't come soon enough for me! Would be nice to actually be able to go to his place, something I very rarely do. I haven't been there since November!
Hoping 35 is my year...