Wednesday, November 12, 2008

The support? It means a lot. I didn't realize that posting about my weight issues would bring out such great comments and encouragement, but I'm thankful for them all just the same. One thing that helps for sure--knowing I'm not alone. Many of us struggle with weight issues each and every day. Some just do better than others.

As for me, I'm tired of it all. I'm tired of the yo-yo dieting, the motivation and than quick diminishing of it all, and the stress eating. I'm desperate to feel better about my size and to actually get to wear some of the clothes in my clothes. Right now? Most doesn't fit and it frustrates the hell out of me.

I'm just finishing my third day of Phase I of South Beach. For those that are unfamiliar--this is a two week intense phase with no carbs, no sugars, no starchy veggies, and no fruit. I am not able to completely cut out the fruit, but I am following it completely otherwise. After the two weeks, I get to slowly introduce good carbs, such as whole grains, and fruit back into my everyday routine. For those that are familiar with Weight Watchers--this is VERY similiar to Core once in Phase II. It focuses on more natural foods, less processed things. I did this two years ago and found great success (lost 8 lbs in the first two weeks--all from my middle!). I fell off the wagon for our cruise and never got back on.

I can't tell you I'm loving it right now. It's tough. I'm tired and I'm a bit cranky from being without my carbs. Come mid next week, I may be an outright bitch. BUT, if it does what it did for me last time, I will lose the cravings for the sweets. I will be able to add the good carbs without wanting to shovel it all in all at once.

As I already mentioned, Andrew and I have made the decision to train for a half marathon through Team in Training. No, we're not running. He gets cramps, and frankly, I'm big chested--not real conducive to running, especially not our first time. So, we're walking. Racewalking to be exact. Larissa trained to racewalk years ago and swears that I'll love it. I'm really excited about our first training session on Saturday. We're two weeks behind everyone else that is training, but we hope to get into it quickly. Our event isn't until April 5th (right after the Dallas Heroes and Handbags event on Friday, April 3rd--great way to help me fit into a great dress for the event!!). It's the Big D marathon in Dallas. The North Texas TNT only has two options for training for Spring marathons--it's either Dallas or ROME. Seriously? While we would of course love to return to Rome because we love the city, we just can't commit to fundraising $6,200 a piece. Not our first attempt!

Tonight was our first walk. We did 2.2 miles in 30 minutes. It's not the quickest pace in the world, but it worked for us. Maggie was snug as a bug in her jogging stroller and Brandy was horribly jealous that she wasn't invited along. If you have never walked my dog, you might not understand, but geesh that girl can pull. Andrew walks much faster than me, and I found myself behind more than once. When we got home, I was noticeable tired and feeling it whereas he said he didn't really feel much. Watch him lose more weight than me without even being on any kind of diet. That's how it goes, isn't it? Men.

I'm really excited to be doing this with Andrew. We are so completely different and tend to have very little common hobbies/interests. He is my best friend and I love him dearly, but we are different. This is fun and exciting to be doing something with him in this way. I'm excited that we've found something not only to help me in my weight loss but to attach to a worthy cause in memory of Allie. I love that Maggie will participate in some capacity with us through her stroller time with us taking family walks, especially helping us garner a healthier lifestyle for her as well. And what I really like about this plan for the half marathon? It gives me a goal to work towards. Just saying I'm going to climb my butt onto an elliptical at the gym is obviously not cutting it anymore. I have a goal, a date in sight. I will cross that finish line, with my wonderful husband by my side.

I will be posting periodically about the journey, and you can rest assured that I will be posting information regarding our fundraising pages once the sites are up and running. I appreciate the support and welcome the feedback and encouragement. I debated more than once to post my weight up on this site as another way to keep accountable, but frankly, I'm just too embarassed to do that. Way too many people read this for me to feel comfortable about saying how much I weigh!! Let's just say I have more than I'd like to admit that I need to lose.

Struggles I am going to have over the next two weeks--catered meals! I have tomorrow nights big Hold'Em for Heroes poker tournament, we have a donor appreciation party next week (guest speaker is Linda Armstrong Kelly, Lance Armstrong's amazing mother), and a baby shower for Jen. Oh wait, what else am I forgetting? Oh yes, that would be THANKSGIVING!! URGH! Meal for twelve people being hosted at my house. Guess Andrew and I will just have to make sure we do a really good walk afterwards! I'll need your help reminding me that just one day is not the excuse to let myself continue to spiral into bad habits because that is my usual routine. It's going to be tough to resist the good food that I know will be put in front of me, but I need to, I HAVE to resist them. Any tips?

Three days down, eleven more bitchy days to go before I move on to Phase II. Success--here I come!


Christina said...

Wishing you good luck by de-lurking, I to struggle with weight issues (though no one believes my wieght or pant size cause I just don't look it) the only time I lose wieght is when I am preggos and I eat everything, but as soon as I give birth it goes straight back on. Just hoping ti isn't double this time cause of the twins.

Sarah said...

Good luck on your efforts! Dieting is WAY overrated (Someting I mentioned in my blog post today) but I'm convincing myself that it is worth the work.

I'm with you when it comes to spiraling back after a "free day"! Once I eat a cookie, I eat 5 more! Ugh! One thing I've been doing is tracking my calorie intake on I can't tell you how helpful it is to see exactly how much I'm eating (it counts everything for you, you just enter the name of the food). I was totally going to eat a dessert the was 680 calories, and didn't know it until I checked! Just not worth it to me now!

Hettinger Happenings said...

My husband is on South Beach and he's been so successful! I do all the grocery shopping and can tell you that once you get to phase II it is soooooo much easier. We put squash & zuchini in everything! The tomato soup (with northen beans etc) that is in the book is FAB! Not sure if you're big on fish, but walmart's frozen section has salmon steaks that are pretty darn tasty, do as the book says and its FAB! My husband lost 40 lbs on South beach and plans on sticking with it forever!

Good luck, I know you can do it!

Susie said...

Hi Jenny!

My advice for Thanksgiving is PORTION CONTROL! Since Turkey Day only falls once a year, and I'm sure you have a lot of favorites you don't want to miss out on, just be wise about the portions. Make one plate with a little of everything and stick to that. Drink lots of water too, which will help fill you up.

Completely denying yourself something that you want will only make you binge on it later. I hope that helps! (PS- I love love love reading your blog-- my roommate and I are regulars!)

Happy Holidays!

gnome517 said...

it's a holi-DAY not a holi-WEEK. think about the foods you will overindulge in; are they worth it?

Mama said...

I lost 40lbs. on South Beach diet. It is not easy in the beginning...I hit rock bottom with my weight and finally was so disgusted with myself that I just refused to shovel in the chocolate and refined carbs. I just DID NOT let them into my body...and it paid off. You CAN do it.

Ally said...

Good luck!! You can do it!! My husband is overweight and we (and I say WE because if he wants to do it, Im right there beside him)have been doing a hokey diet that he downloaded from the net but he has lost 15 lbs in just over a month! So apparently its not so hokey! Losing is hard, its hard to get into a routine and eat things that you wouldnt normally eat. Now that we have been doing this for 5 weeks, its much easier to get into the habit of not eating crap and making healthy choices when you are not at home.

Again, Good Luck!!

Angie said...

Great tip for avoiding over-indulgence at Thanksgiving AND where you know there will be buffets...Have a large glass of water before you eat. You could also have a snack of apples (when you can add fruit back in) or carrots and celery before you sit down for the dinners. It takes your body 20 minutes to realize that you've eaten...hence why people usually eat to much. If you snack healthily before you sit down, you've got a head start!

Also...add in some weight lifting to your routine. Muscle burns more calories (even when you are sitting on the couch watching TV). I've been working out for 2 years now (I enjoy taking classes at the gym, I'm a social girl and like to work out with other people). I've only lost about 10 pounds, but I've gone from a 12-14 pants size to a 6-8! You can do it!

Rebecca said...

My only advice is WATER, WATER, WATER. Drink at least 8 ounces about 20-30 minutes before you eat, then eat small portions and grab the gum. Yes, gum. When chewing gum you can't eat anymore :) Sill trick, but it works!! Good luck!

Jaunna said...

Ahh I need to do Phase I again....I was doing good and somewhere jumped ship...I know you will do great especially with such a GREAT GOAL ahead of you!!!

The Wunsch Bunch said...

Jenny, I have done the South Beach several times and I swear by it. After having four kids I always battle the middle bulge. I also see fast results in the stomach area. Stick with it and maybe stretch Phase I for four weeks -- that's what I do. If I am dedicated, I will loose 20 lbs in the first month. The first week is the hardest, but if you stick to it you will find a whole new way of eating. Even when I am not on the SB I always think about carb/sugar intake. On Thanksgiving just eat meat & veggies, and treat yourself to one "off diet" item. Don't cheat your "buddy".

I too did a 1/2 marathon with TNT this past summer in San Diego. Why? My dedication to this cause stems from your baby girl. See you next year at the 5K.

Twisted Branches said...

You will love race walking!! I pop my ipod in my ears and am out the door with a whoosh!
But I wasn't always that way. I know exactly how you feel and I know exactly how hard it is to get going. I know the tears, the frustration, the pain. I know it all. It must be a life decision. Until I got that, I was getting nowhere.
You can do this!! You have inspired SO many of us with your grace and strength. I don't think you realize how very strong you are Jenny. I really don't. You don't give yourself enough credit.
Once you feel the difference, the cravings etc are easier to conquer. Plus, and this might sound weird, you will be a better mother. I know I am merely because I feel so much better about myself.
We are ALL pulling for you and you've got a pretty impressive cheering squad in heaven too. :)

Sam Hill said...

I'll be praying for you to be able to make it through those first two very hard weeks. I couldn't even begin to imagine. I'd have to say carbs are my #1 favorite food. BREAD especially. I'm sure I'd starve if it weren't for carbs. God bless you!!!! :)

Jen said...

I haven't had a chance to read the comments but I do know how you feel- my weight had been a struggle for me for a long time and it is always something I have to be dilligent about. I don't rec this all the time but give your experience with being on the awful yo yo dieting train which is truly a horrible way to live and you deserve much better I really rec you check out intuitive eating- it is a general concept but there is also a book on it. But this combined with your general positive outlook and you now doing exercise for a bigger purpose rather then just weight loss you might find it appealing. I'll be honest when I read chapters I sort of break out into a sweat thinking about trusting myself to eat and not monitor calories or do some new fad diet but I have heard it worked wonderfuly and it is a way for you to focus on better health without deprivation dieting and it would be helpful for any future pregnancies.

Malinda said...

Hi Jenny--

I had to laugh at your statement about being a little cranky...Truth is, whenever I start to get back on the wagon, I'm as mean as a junkyard dog! Grrrrr! Get the he** out of my way and let me sulk in peace!

Thankfully, though, it passes. And the realization that I am at least a little "in control" again helps.

Hang in there, dear! Remember, this is not about clothing or looking great or impressing's about your health and increasing your energy.

You are beautiful inside and out--don't forget it!

H & B's Mimi

Tracy said...

I ran across this website and it sounds like it might help with south beach meals for holidays and beyond. I have made a few and they are really good. Good luck to you!


leija said...

So, about a year ago I looked into my mirror and noticed that I was huge! =) I made my own diet up. For b-fast I would have a zone bar and a flavored coffee, lunch and dinner a lean cuisene meal. For snacks I would have almonds and carrots. I would only use fat free salad dressing on the carrots. I also gave myself 1 day a week to eat whatever I wanted. I never went crazy but I always looked forward to that day! After a few months I started to exercise. Now I have dropped 150 pounds and am at my goal weight. It is hard and frustrating..but it can be done. You can do it! =)

Jennifer said...

woohoo! Keep it up. Don't worry about turkey day...enjoy and pick it back up the next day. Walking will do wonders girl! Get ya some walking weights and boy--you got yourself a workout there Keep us posted.

Lisa L said...

When I did the Honolulu marathon for Team in Training, I had to walk 4 miles 4 times a week, and then a LONG walk on the weekend. We're talking MILES...up to 24 at one point. I was the thinest I've ever been. You will love the thrill of conquering not only the weight but of being able to do a long race. It is an awesome experience. ( I walked....took me ages eg 8 hours, 5 mins and 58 secs:) Oh, and I also came 24,478 out of 27+ thousand. I don't care about times, just the fact that I did it!

Brooke said...

When my daughter was 13 months old my hubby and I did South Beach together. We lost tons of weight and have never felt so good or had more energy. Granted those 1st two weeks are very very tough. The south beach cook book is great and has some yummy alternatives. Thanksgiving will be tough-try to just do things in moderation that day. A little taste of each thing, instead of heaping piles of each food. Then first thing the next morning-do your walking...and poof-guilt free girly!!! My daughter is 4 1/2 now and my hubby has never gained any of the weight back. I am pregnant with #3 right now-so I tend to gorge myself while pregnant-heee heee. Back on track after the baby comes though-and I know the weight will come off. You both should be so proud-it is so difficult to lose weight and stick with it. Doing it together will make it soooo much easier though!

Jessica said...


Where are you training? I am a mentor with TNT and we train in McKinney. I was wondering if you are training there or At White Rock Lake in Dallas. Either place is great!

I got involved back in '05 after following your journey so religiously. I wanted to do something to make a difference and I started with Light the Night. Then I got something in the mail for TNT and decided to do it. I have been hooked ever since and it is a huge part of my life now. I have you and Allie to thank for it!

I am mentoring, training and findraising for Rome this season. I am finished with my fundraising already and hope to double what I have done already.

Anywho, wanted to wish you luck on the TNT journey and ask what team you are a member of. It is so amazing.....congrats!


beezer9212 said...

I just wanted to drop in and share my story with you Jenny. I too used to struggle w/ the last 15-20 lbs of "baby" weight. Last year after we moved to Idaho, I realized that my baby wasn't a baby anymore (he was 6) and I wanted to make a permanent change. I discovered I don't know if you've heard of it or not, but it was the only thing that worked for me. It wasn't an easy transition, but almost a year later, I can proudly say that I have changed my eating habits for the better (and lost 16 lbs. in the process). I hope you are able to achieve your goal! Keep up the good work girl!

mum1228 said...

I wouldn't worry about Turkey day. That's a "free" day for me. Eat a healthy light breakfast and lunch and dive in a bit at dinner. I know this may seem like bad advice by some, but it works for me. Maybe you won't fall of the wagon if you are giving yourself permission to enjoy Thanksgiving food and all. It may keep the guilt at bay...a bit anyway. I always excercise the day before as well. It helps thinking some of the calories were burned off. Good Luck!!!

fuzzandfuzzlet said...

I think the most important tip for not over indulging at events is to have a high fiber and filling snack right before you go (even if you eat in in the car in route)

Make sure there is something you can eat.

Keep a glass of water in your hand at all times.

Don`t let over eating beget over eating. IF you fall off the wagin don`t let that be an excuse to stay off the wagon. Get back on with the very next meal.

You said that many of us struggle with weight, but some do it better than others. I think the ones that do it well have simply found the tips and tricks that work for them. What works for me, might not work for you. Using a tip or trick that does not fit into your personality or lifestyle is not going to work. You have to look for the tips that make you think "wow that makes a lot of sense" or "oh, I can do that easily"

I hate exercise.

I compensate by sneaking in as much activity as possible. I walk my kids to and from school. I park at the far end of parking lots. I do not use elevators. I have basement utilities and cart a million loads of laundry per week up and down stairs. I pace when I am on the phone. My theory is that every step counts. The more steps I take per day the more calories I am going to burn.

Sasha said...

Yay for your exciting decision! TNT is such a fabulous org and a great way to get exercising. My SIL did TNT a few years back to honor my FIL who has CML, but is doing well thanks to Gleevac.

I do want to throw this out there... after your finish racewalking your half, if you ever get inspired to take up running, come visit my blog. I've done a fabulous plan called the Couch to 5K plan- it teaches you how to run- taking small steps at a time towards a 5K. Mr. Sasha lost 60 pounds doing the 5K, and ex-smoker me has now been running for 5 years, and I swore I could never run.

There's a pretty big group of bloggy moms who run and are a part of the Couch to 5K Revolution- let me know if you are ever interested in more info!

But I'll be following your racewalking journey and am so excited for you to meet your goal! Go go go!

Seth, Elisa, Adam, and Clara said...

Hi Jenny,

I too struggle with the exact same weight issues and found myself contemplating the same thing before getting pregnant with my second child. If you ever want a racewalking buddy for the "during the week" training and Andrew is not available let me know, I'm close. I participated with Larissa in the San Diego marathon in 2002 and had a fabulous experience with it. Race walking rocks!! Best of luck with your journey!